I am helping my Developer boss to micromanage the situation at work. I am focussing on checking that all the safety rules are in place in the business to avoid infections. Yes, even how others are washing their hands. Especially noting if they are washing between their fingers. I turned my own family into a sweatshop and caused horrendous lines at Bunnings while striving to repair everything in my house. Also, I directed my family to build a bomb shelter with every item known to man (definitely all the best toilet paper, Clorox wipes, and N95 masks) in logical preparation for the apocalypse.

1. The Director - ESTJ

The Commanding Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

I have witnessed it. Enough said.

Neuroticism Level™: LOW

Low openness, high conscientiousness, high extroversion, low agreeableness

I am:

"2IC, to the Developer, of the doomsday shelter."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Not sure if they want to be in a witness protection program.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Contracts the illness by refusing to work from home, afraid of missing a promotion opportunity but only at work for fun. Ensuring that their kids and their spouse and everyone they know is staying in and obeying the self isolation orders.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They want to hear that everything will be all right at the end, that they understood this and that it is just another level of challenge they need to overcome.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Turned their own family into a sweatshop and caused horrendous lines at Bunnings while striving to repair everything in their house. Directed their family to build a bomb shelter with every item known to man (definitely all the best toilet paper, Clorox wipes, and N95 masks) in logical preparation for the apocalypse.

Go to their pattern

I am pondering about the long term effect of COVID-19. Especially concerning the economic aspect of my businesses. I became overly impassioned with a disturbing hypothesis, such as how theoretically letting the weak die and reopening the economy would save us all. I then accrued a mass of followers to lead a live protest (definitely standing closer than 1.5 m apart) on it without considering anyone’s feelings.

2. The Developer - ENTJ

The Domineering Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

Zero concern for the thousands that they have laid off.

Neuroticism Level™: LOW

Moderate openness, high conscientiousness, high extroversion, low agreeableness.

I am:

"Establishing the doomsday shelter and delegating to a bureaucracy should they be the only ones left alive."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Hustling. No time for alone time.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Contracts the illness by refusing to work from home, afraid of missing a promotion opportunity. Probably very frustrated that this virus has been allowed to get out of hand like this and they are likely sharing their best knowledge with everyone they know about how it happened and what needs to be done to stop it.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They want to hear that everything will be all right at the end, that they understood this and that it is just another level of challenge they need to overcome.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Theoretically letting the weak die and reopening the economy would save us all. They then accrued a mass of followers to lead a live protest (definitely standing closer than 1.5m apart) without considering anyone’s feelings.

Go to their pattern

On hearing the news, I immediately jumped in my car and drove to a rural area. I incessantly walked around my neighbourhood, praying for emergencies to arise just for the sake of the adrenaline rush. While doing this, I broke quarantine, busting into a neighbour’s house after hearing someone yell (was it a damsel in distress?) only to find out they were just watching Netflix.

3. The Results - ESTP

The Rebelling Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

Just getting on with business as Mr. Results (Trump) is.

Neuroticism Level™: LOW

Moderate openness, moderate conscientiousness, high extroversion, low agreeableness.

I am:

"Establishing a toilet paper company and stand to make millions."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Gym, vandalise deserted buildings, skinny dip.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Contracts the illness by breaking quarantine to maintain lifting schedule at the local YMCA. May have one of the hardest times staying at home. The lack of both freedom and social interaction will be difficult. Likely to be on social media to help deal with it.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They want to hear that everything will be all right at the end, that they understood this and that it is just another level of challenge they need to overcome.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Incessantly walked around their neighborhood, praying for emergencies to arise just for the sake of the adrenaline rush. While doing this, they broke quarantine, busting into a neighbour’s house after hearing someone call out.

Go to their pattern

I produce memes about Covid-19 that circulate around as fast as the itself, as well as opening up long debates on Reddit. I devised a plan to move all human beings to outer space because we could theoretically escape all infectious diseases in a new biosphere. I somehow tricked to aboard stolen NASA spaceships by bribing them with toilet paper without any real logistics figured out (not enough space suits, no grocery delivery, no Amazon prime space drones, etc.).

4. The Inspirational - ENTP

The Inventive Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

No surprises here.

Neuroticism Level™: LOW

High openness, low conscientiousness, moderate-high extroversion, low agreeableness.

I am:

"Of the view that I am low risk, so I do not care."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Find someone to have a mutual debate together, socially distanced, of course.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

The last of the extroverts to catch COVID-19, contracts the illness during brief removal of mask in order to be heard clearly in a heated argument with the 7-11 clerk. Likely feeling very pent-up. May be busy investigating the origin of the virus and the cure for it and debating this with everyone with whom they are able to interact.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They want to hear that everything will be all right at the end, that they understood this and that it is just another level of challenge they need to overcome.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Devised a plan to move all human beings to outer space because we could theoretically escape all infectious diseases in a new biosphere. They somehow encouraged people to aboard stolen NASA spaceships without any real logistics figured out (not enough space suits, no grocery delivery etc.).

Go to their pattern

I am very saddened by the news and I am seeking actively to help everyone whether they have asked me or not. I focussed on what ideas I had regarding making the world a better place for my fellow socially isolated humans. I then told everyone to hold hands or hug in an effort to lift spirits without taking into account the horrific logistical and dire implications (including the literal lifting of spirits as they escaped from the bodies of the deceased) of this advice.

5. The Persuader - ENFJ

The Charasmatic Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

Interfering, as per usual.

Neuroticism Level™: LOW

Moderate openness, high conscientiousness, high extroversion, high agreeableness.

I am:

"Continually clashing with the Developer about leadership and decisions."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Mediate or delover a motivational speech online.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Wears a mask when friends become sick but, nevertheless, still insists upon trying to provide close-proximity moral support. Likely sorely missing social interactions. With those to whom they can connect, they will be likely to assertively tell them to stay in. They may reassure them based on the latest findings about the virus which may or may not be correct.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They want a scene to shine and express themselves and their greatest encouragement comes from the admiration they feel. Be sincere as they will know if you fake it.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Focussed on what ideas they had regarding making the world a better place for their fellow socially isolated humans. They then told everyone to hold hands or hug in an effort to lift spirits despite social distancing measures.

Go to their pattern

I was absolutely freaked out by the news and started at first to overthink. Then I decided to join help groups to assist sick people. I posted on all of my social media accounts my personal mobile phone number, stating for anyone to reach out for assistance (even for people I do not know) at any moment. I quickly wound up giving everything I had away to help others, only to face having to wipe their bottom with their own hands (aka the colonies worst nightmare).

6. The Appraiser - ESFJ

The Spotlighter Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment

Seems about right.

Neuroticism Level™: LOW

Low-moderate openness, high conscientiousness, high extroversion, high agreeableness.

I am:

"Formerly the most popular kid in the 80’s, now I am making a comeback."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Bake, make tea and more tea.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Always partying, "self-isolation will mess with my shopping schedule", but washes hands more often than the Counselor. Initial impulse will be to help others. They are cooking meals and placing them on sick and elderly people’s porches. They are on their phones checking on people.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They want a scene to shine and express themselves and their greatest encouragement comes from the admiration they feel. Be sincere as they will know if you fake it.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Posted on all of their social media accounts their personal phone number, stating for anyone to reach out for assistance (even people they did not know) at any moment. They quickly wound up giving everything they had away to help others, only to face having to wipe their bottom with their own hands.

Go to their pattern

Upon hearing the news, I immediately started to worry and check up on the health status of all my friends and family. I spent all of their time trying to go viral with a musical pandemic parody video posted on YouTube after impulsively drinking a full bottle of wine. I stayed in character during the entire pandemic, shirking all other responsibilities, all for the fame. I think I had a cult following who had been encouraged likewise to forget all of their mortal daily duties.

7. The Promoter - ENFP

The Curious Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

Will be in a panic with no time to work out the facts that have been published by the government.

Neuroticism Level™: MODERATE

High openness, low conscientiousness, moderate-high extroversion, high agreeableness.

I am:

"Being hired by the Developer to advertise their doomsday shelter."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Make tea with the Persuader.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Cannot resist hanging out with friends despite their coughing. Likely to be a source of love and encouragement to those with whom they have contact.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They want a scene to shine and express themselves and their greatest encouragement comes from the admiration they feel. Be sincere as they will know if you fake it.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Spent all of their time trying to go viral with a musical pandemic parody video posted on YouTube after impulsively drinking a full bottle of wine. They stayed in character during the entire pandemic, shirking all other responsibilities.

Go to their pattern

I completely ignore the advice of social distancing and the avoiding of crowds. I continue to party like there is no tomorrow. I had the world’s largest Zoom drinking and Truth or Dare strip party (definitely over shared and wound up over 50% naked as they had started the party pants-less). Afterwards, I still came down with a strong case of intolerable fear of missing out, so I broke quarantine to party real hard down on the beach.

8. The Counselor - ESFP

The Spontaneous Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

Inconsiderate. Will be the cause of more draconian restrictions of the socialist governments.

Neuroticism Level™: MODERATE

Moderate openness, moderate conscientiousness, high extroversion, high agreeableness.

I am:

"Annoyed that I have to cancel my comedy shows now."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Party as if there is no tomorrow.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Always partying, "self-isolation will mess with my shopping schedule". As will the Results, has an extremely difficult time without social interaction. Will make the best of things by making Youtube videos of themselves and their family performing Coronavirus songs.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They want a scene to shine and express themselves and their greatest encouragement comes from the admiration they feel. Be sincere as they will know if you fake it.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Had the world’s largest Zoom drinking and Truth or Dare strip party. Afterward, they still came down with a strong case of intolerable fear of missing out so they broke quarantine to party hard on the beach.

Go to their pattern

I am in a state of emotional distress and I am drawing pictures to calm down. I threw everything out that did not spark joy, for the sake of making my environment more comfortable for me and my family. I then realized that I needed 75% of the stuff that I had thrown away and now had no way to purchase it with the extended wait times on Amazon Prime - why isn’t anything but $100 toilet paper to wipe my golden bottom considered essential?

9. The Specialist - ISFP

The Discovering Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

Concentrating on self.

Neuroticism Level™: HIGH

Moderate openness, moderate conscientiousness, low extroversion, high agreeableness.

I am:

"Going to China anyway."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Write songs or poetry.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Does not pay attention to safety guidelines, gets sick when their contagious Promoter friend comes around. Likely model peace and contentment during a time when others are tied due to isolation.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They need assurance even if things gets worse, you will still be together through it. Assure them as often as you can and do not let them feel lonely. Remind them often how much you value and rely on their strength.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Threw everything out that did not spark joy, for the sake of making their environment more comfortable for themselves and their family. They then realized that they needed 75% of the stuff they had thrown away.

Go to their pattern

I am saddened by the news and start to counsel people around me and share motivational messages. I went utterly AWOL, overly comfortable with being locked at home. I convinced myself that I knew how everyone could live their best lives (because I think I can magically understand who others are without knowing them). With this preternatural knowledge, I claimed how the pandemic would play out based upon their musings of human behaviour. Most people didn’t listen and for the few that did, I argued with them and I could not change their stubborn minds.

10. The Investigator - INFJ

The Compassionate Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

Most likely self isolate when they have not come back from overseas.

Neuroticism Level™: MODERATE-LOW

Moderate openness, high concientiousness, moderate extroversion, high agreeableness.

I am:

"Not concerned at all that there is a lockdown. I stay at home all day anyway. I am the Fuhrer"

Loneliness Defence Method™: Write.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Contracts illness by refusing to work from home, afraid of missing promotion opportunity but only at work for fun.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Went utterly AWOL, overly comfortable with being locked up at home,

Self-isolates but breaks the isolation with a desperate trip to the local bookstore three weeks in. Pre-occupied with knowing that many are suffering greatly with this. Their thoughts are on those in Italy that were too old to be treated and have been left alone to die or gasp for breath. Their thoughts are on the children who are victims of and / or who are witnessing domestic abuse because of the strain of confinement. They think of the hurting people whose loved-ones have been taken by the virus. They try to distract themselves but, ultimately, feel a sense of responsibility to help the hurting. They may experience depression and anxiety from the weight of it all.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They need assurance even if things gets worse, you will still be together through it. Assure them as often as you can and do not let them feel lonely. Remind them often how much you value and rely on their strength.

Go to their pattern

I am experiencing emotional discomfort after hearing the news and I am trying to crack up some jokes and create some memes to feel more positive and lighten up the atmosphere a bit. I fantasised about an alternative universe that I could immerse myself in, to the point of being out of touch with reality using video games. I enjoyed this so much that I forgot to go to work, apply for unemployment, pay the bills and perform basic hygiene (definitely did not use the scarce toilet paper).

11. The Agent - INFP

The Wonderment Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

A bit of a nuisance, as usual.

Neuroticism Level™: HIGH

High openness, low conscientiousness, low extroversion, high agreeableness.

I am:

"Helping console others amidst the chaos around them."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Daydream on a good day, catastrophise on an other day.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Either is not paying attention to the safety guidelines and contracts the illness from the door handle of a local café or will not let the repair man in to fix the TV antenna as ess, aitch, one, tee scared of contracting the illness. Busy dreaming about the potential the virus has for human good. It is bringing humanity together in beautiful ways, teaching people to behave unselfishly, thinking of the well-being of others before their own. They see beauty, whereas others see only pain.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They need assurance even if things gets worse, you will still be together through it. Assure them as often as you can and do not let them feel lonely. Remind them often how much you value and rely on their strength.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Fantasized about an alternative universe that they could immerse themselves in, to the point of being out of touch with reality. Then enjoyed this so much that they forgot to go to work, apply for unemployment, pay their bills, and perform basic hygiene (definitely did not use toilet paper).

Go to their pattern

After I read that the virus dies at direct contact with air at 26/27 °C, I set my home air conditioner to that temperature and made sure to stay home as much as possible. I created an elaborate robotised death trap for anyone who came within 1.5 metres. I was incredibly delighted when it claimed it’s first victim even though it was their home delivery guy (most importantly, their food was strategically unscathed).

12. The Achiever - ISTP

The Fierce Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

The (hot) self isolator.

Neuroticism Level™: MODERATE-LOW

Moderate openness, moderate-conscientiousness, low extroversion, low agreeableness.

I am:

"Saying that it is all a government lie."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Stalk their exes.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Unaware of the viral outbreak, contracts the illness upon return from a month-long hiking trip. Might stay busy while quarantined by making face masks themselves with the materials they have at home. Likely to have the Australian app and promote its use.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They need assurance even if things gets worse, you will still be together through it. Assure them as often as you can and do not let them feel lonely. Remind them often how much you value and rely on their strength.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Created an elaborate robotized death trap for anyone who came within 2M.

Go to their pattern

I am saddened by the news and I focus on doing acts of service towards my dear ones to make them feel better and safer. I reviewed historical literature, specifically regarding the 1918 Spanish Flu (aka the most recent severe pandemic). I then suggested we allow those who are mildly ill to leave their homes immediately to create a deadly second wave. I would then utilize steam shovels (old-time tools) to create mass graves as a grand gesture to recreate a sense of heartfelt tradition.

13. The Practitioner - ISFJ

The Unique Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

The self isolator.

Neuroticism Level™: MODERATE

Low-moderate openness, high conscientiousness, moderate extroversion, high agreeableness.

I am:

"Of the view that no disease can wipe out the most common behaviour pattern which contains my good self."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Binge watch Grey's Anatomy or reruns of Friends with a bucket of KFC.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Follows the safety guidelines but contracts the illness from the Persuader spouse. Already often busy caring for the hurting, elderly, sick etc. While being careful to keep quarantine, they are making and delivering meals, toilet paper, tissues, soap, and hand sanitizer from their personal stockpile they had months before the virus was even heard of. Interpreting 1.5m isolation as 100.5m.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They have difficulty verbalizing their feelings, so create an environment where they feel confident to externalize. Take the first step by sharing how you feel and, if you do not hear immediate feedback, give them enough space and time to feel comfortable. Reiterate that it is okay to feel down once in a while.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Reviewed historical literature, specifically regarding the 1918 Spanish Flu. Wiped down every surface, including lamp shades. Cannot be too careful!

Go to their pattern

I have already dealt with outbreaks of other viruses in the past. I smirk when I reveal that I still have plenty of masks. I pass a few leftover ones to my close friends. I have continued to live in an annoyingly regimented fashion according to my own approximately one bazillion rules. These daily rituals include using four-ply toilet paper (by annoyingly doubling up on 2ply), licking all of the plastic produce bags at the store before use and touching all of the fruit before buying precisely none of it as nothing is ever good enough for me.

14. The Objective Thinker - ISTJ

The Orderly Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

Perfect. No surprises here.

Neuroticism Level™: MODERATE

Low openness, high conscientiousness, low extroversion, low agreeableness.

I am:

"Tagging along with the Perfectionist."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Clean, redecorate or renovate the house. Or do all at the same time.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Strictly follows the safety guidelines yet contracts the the illness from the Appraiser spouse. Likely already be on the front lines helping people in some way, as a police officer, firefighter or military personnel. Those who are not will be very protective of their friends and families, ensuring that they obey the quarantine rules.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They have difficulty verbalizing their feelings, so create an environment where they feel confident to externalize. Take the first step by sharing how you feel and, if you do not hear immediate feedback, give them enough space and time to feel comfortable. Reiterate that it is okay to feel down once in a while.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

May have convinced themselves that COVID-19 is a lie so that the government can experiment on the people or made some other equally hyperbolic claim.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Continued living in an annoyingly regimented fashion according to their own approximately one bazillion rules. Touching all of the fruit before buying precisely none of it.

Go to their pattern

I theorise about the origin of the outbreak and discuss it with friends and family. I spent all of my time pondering the implications for the future of society regarding the pandemic. Specifically, I zeroed in on the likely dystopian future (in a world without toilet paper, where no man can ever visit the loo. I occasionally muttered about it under my breath and, when others asked what I was talking about, I quickly deemed them ignorant fools.

15. The Perfectionist - INTP

The Intelligent Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

As they would. Probably self isolated.

Neuroticism Level™: LOW-MODERATE

High openness, low consciousness, low extroversion, low agreeableness.

I am:

"Buying an obscene amount of toilet paper and I am also beginning to make my own, somehow."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Watch game videos or conspiracy theories media on YouTube.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Self-isolates but inevitably contracts the virus due to poor hygiene. Busy at home developing models of the virus’ potential to do worldwide political and economic damage.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They have difficulty verbalizing their feelings, so create an environment where they feel confident to externalize. Take the first step by sharing how you feel and, if you do not hear immediate feedback, give them enough space and time to feel comfortable. Reiterate that it is okay to feel down once in a while.

Now that it's been going on for ever:

Occasionally muttered about the lack of toilet paper under their breath and, when others asked what they were talking about, they quickly deemed them ignorant fools.

Go to their pattern

I research and prepare in order to minimise the risk of getting infected as well as making sure to share such information with dear ones. I cocksurely spouted off over the Internet about my contrived COVID-19 conspiracy theory and obtained a decent cult following. I have convinced myself that COVID-19 is a lie so that the government can experiment on the citizens or I make some other equally hyperbolic claim.

16. The Enhancer - ENTJ

The Knowledgable Covid Ninteener™.

E Hunter™ comment:

Basically carry on as normal and think that the whole thing is driven my mass hysteria. Some self isolate when there is no need when others stand in long dole and election queues spreading the virus to their newest friends. The voters will get the virus in preference to a fine for not voting.
I would bring in rationing of toilet paper per WWII rationing. For the US, 22.5 sheets per person per day. For the UK, 3 per day and apply that to the colonies as well!

Neuroticism Level™: MODERATE-LOW

Moderate openness, high conscientiousness, low extroversion, low agreeableness.

I am:

"Staying at home, as usual, nothing has changed. I am most likely to be working on some odd project."

Loneliness Defence Method™: Playing video games, or (rarely) hanging out with the Perfectionist watching videos or updating their own website.

E. Hunter Articulation™:

Self-isolates in their well-stocked apocalypse bunker and never contracts the illness. Busy working on a cure and analyzing the genetics of the virus. Refuses to download the app promoted by the People's Republic of Australia. They do not trust the Chief Medical Officer or the Government or Amazon, who are hosting the app, under any circumstances whatsoever.

What they want to hear to be encouraged over the COVID-19 situation:

They have difficulty verbalizing their feelings, so create an environment where they feel confident to externalize. Take the first step by sharing how you feel and, if you do not hear immediate feedback, give them enough space and time to feel comfortable. Reiterate that it is okay to feel down once in a while.

Go to their pattern